Q: I hate my latest recording. I listen to it over and over again, and every time I find more things wrong. I lost control of the project. My artistic vision has been compromised. Worse yet, everybody who hears it thinks that it's the best thing I've ever done! Now what?

A: Publicly denounce the producer . And be sure to book him or her well in advance for your next project. (If you ARE the producer, and you REALLY need to ask this question, you should consider another line of work.)

Q: Pin 2 hot or pin 3 hot?

A: Islam or Judaism?

Q: Do you realize how offensive that is to Moslems and Jews?

A: Not really. Which is why Jim tries to keep me in a back room dealing with inanimate objects.

Q: Should I put new strings on my guitar or bass before a session?

A: A day or two before is a good thing. But only if you recheck the intonation.

Q: Will a recording made in a vintage analog studio sound like an old record?

A: Only if you want it to. It certainly can sound better than a lot of NEW records .

Q: Who paid for Lenny Bruce's funeral?

A: Phil Spector

Q: Should I bring my own drums ?

A: This has really evolved. Some years ago, most pro producers hired a session drummer. Then, for some time, the band's drummer was allowed to play, but only on a special kit that had been hand-selected piece by piece, often mixing different brands of drums to obtain just the "right" sound. Tuffy's Barn has two comple sets of maple Ludwigs and a variety of cymbals, but if your drummer plays best on his own set, then that's definitely the way to go.

Q: Do you have a piano?

A: Yes. But not a big wooden one with strings. For most projects, digital (ouch!) pianos are really the way to go. They are a versatile and practical way to record the sound of a piano. We use both the Ensoniq TS-10, which is capable of many great sounds besides piano, and the studio classic Kurzweil 250, an extremely fine instrument which has more of a piano "feel". Wanna know a secret? Most of the piano sounds you hear on the radio weren't recorded from a big wooden piano with strings. Here's another secret, if you promise not to tell: that big wooden piano you see on the stage at a rock or pop music concert may have had the "guts" removed and replaced by a digital piano!

Speaking of electric keyboards, Tuffy's of course has a Rhodes, as well as a variety of organs and synths.(see keys )

Q: Why did the producer rent a penthouse appartment?

A: He wanted to stay well above the noise floor.

Q: What is meant by the "infinite resolution" of analog recording?

A: It means that, unlike analog, the best digital system ever made is is incapable of recording ALL the music.

Q: Who was the first to track a session dressed in surgical scrubs?

A: Phil Spector

Q: What microphones do I need for my home studio?

A: A Shure SM-57. Another SM-57. A Countryman direct box. A Shure SM-81. Another SM-81. A Sennheiser MD 421 (for loud music). An AKG 414 (for less loud music). In that order. For a power trio, '81's on drum overheads, '57 on snare, MD-421 on kick, other '57 on guitar amp, bass through the Countryman. For variations, '57's on overhead, bass DI, & interchange an '81 and the 421 on kick, snare, & amp. A few moments spent on positioning-(which, obviously, is a combination of distance from and perpedicularity to source) will take the place not only of a lot of EQ, but a lot of different microphones as well.

Q: Have you ever publicly humiliated an ADAT like Fletcher has?

A. Nah. They have their uses, as even Fletcher admits. We keep a couple around so folks with live and home multitrack projects can interface comfortably with the real world. Besides, it's more about the message than the medium. Give an infinite number of Monkees an infinite number of ADATS and sooner or later you'd get Sgt. Pepper .

Q: Do you realize how offensive that is to monkeys?

A: See above.

Q: In Manfred Mann's Earth Band's cover of Blinded by the Light, is the singer singing what I think he's singing?

A: The Springsteen lyric is "Revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night", just more street racing talk from Bruce; a deuce is a hot-rod with dual carburetion. A lot of folks didn't get that "hemi-powered drones scream down the boulevard " line from Born to Run, either. (a hemi is a species of high-performance engine)

Q: Does anyone actually read faq?

A: The better question is, "Does anyone actually ask them?

Q: Should we bring our own amps?

A: We have a variety of amps that work well in a studio situation, and it may save time to let the Barncats choose the amp that will best give you the recorded sound you're looking for. If you have an amp that really lets you wail, by all means bring it along. But remember, a microphone doesn't "hear" in the same way that your ears do. Bass players may be especially pleased at how well our vintage Ampeg SVT goes to tape. (There is also an original B15-N for you jazz types)

 

Q: Who was nicknamed "Phil Ramone" when he made his comeback producing the Ramones' End of the Century in 1979?

A: Phil Spector

 

Q: Did Kurt Cobain write the songs for Hole's Live Through This ?

A: In an interview published in Creem magazine at the time of the album's release, drummer Patty Schemmel reveals that she wrote the songs. And, in the same interview, Courteney Love verifies this. I do like the Cobain conspiracy theory, though, it really adds to the legend.

 

Q: Speaking of legends, whatever happened to Geege?

A: THAT is the only question for which I have no answer.

 

Q: Any ancient wisdom from the Masters with which to leave us?

A: Cheap. Fast. Good. Pick any two.